Things I never thought I'd say...

1. "The cat is NOT a hockey puck!"
2. "If you wake your sister up, you are going out to live with the dogs."
3. "Please don't use your dirty socks as hand puppets."
4. "The Beagle is not a pony. The Lab, on the other hand, is fair game."
5. "Boogers are not glue... and you still can't eat either."
6. "That had better be chocolate pudding...."
7. "Outlet covers must look like powdered sugar doughnuts because the baby keeps trying to lick them."
8.  Me: "Sprinkles is eating a Cheerio she found on the floor.  Did they have Cheerios this morning?"
     Hubby:  "They did."
     Me:  "Cool."
9.  "You need to wipe BEFORE you get in the tub!"
10.  "Why does you bum smell like 8 day old road kill?"
11.  "Spiderman, have you flushed the toilet?"
12.  "It is not wise to call someone names while they are wiping your bum."
13.  "Why does it look like a rabbit took a crap on the carpet?  Oh!  Chocolate cookie!"
14.  Hubbs: "Why did you wipe your nose with your noodle?"
15.  "Get your wiener off your fishy!  You sleep with that!"
16.  Do NOT hurt the trees!  We have talked about this!


  1. Hey I'm your newest follower and I have another one for you. The toilet bowl is not Barbie swimming pool. And just wait until they are teens, we would have to sensor those comments.

  2. Hahahahaaa! That's a tragic one! :)

  3. "Please take the mermaids out of your dress, we haven't paid for them yet."