Me: "Don't use the furniture as a jungle gym, Monkey Boy."
Sass: *continues to swing/jump/chew on the arm of the couch as if I haven't spoken*
Me: "Sass, quit it. Get off the couch."
Sass: *more ignoring*
Me: "I said get off the couch!" *snatching ensues*
Sass: "You forgot my milk, Mom."
Me: "I didn't forget it. I'm getting it right now."
Sass: "I'm thirsty. I want some milk, Mom!"
Me: "I am pouring it right now. Use your eyes, please."
Sass: "Well, Duh." *eye roll*
Me: *more snatching ensues*
He also liberally applies "Seriously?" and "I told you!" to his everyday
I will admit to a shorter fuse due to hormones and general pregnancy exhaustion, but come ON, little man! You just had to skip ages 5-13 and go straight to teenager with a wish for certain irreparable bodily harm? But why? Even Daddy has had enough... and he has WAY more patience than I do. Dude... just.... Please?
Sass Monkey the Dictator Barbarian