Monday, September 10, 2012

Ug… weekends

     Ug… weekends.  The former favorite days of the week have now been forced to reside somewhere between Wednesday (the trickster middle day) and Thursday (the bastard step-child of Friday).  Weekends now are nothing like weekends of the past where the hardest thing hubby and I had to do before 11 a.m. was to decide whether we wanted an omelet from Sweet Water Café or quiche from Lost Dog for breakfast.  Was it a Tecate beach day or should we just grab the handle of Firefly and some lemonade? Well rats, my green beach cover-up is dirty… I guess I’ll have to wear my grey one…  poo. 
     Weekends now begin around 6 a.m. with Sass Monkey ricocheting downstairs in full “pancake hunt” mode (and GAWD HELP US if we forget the sausage) and with Sprinkles thumping on her crib, screeching like crazed goblin (yes, goblin).  Once the beasts have been appeased with whatever breakfast we could throw at them before they started to notice that Mommy and Daddy were made of meat (just… like… bacon…  mmmmm, long pig), then come THE CHORES.  Not like the house-triage kind of chores you do during the middle of the week, but the Scrubbing Bubbles, Lemon-Scented, toilet brush wielding, how-the-hell-did-he-get-pee-up-there? chores.  Hubby and I have learned to distract the screeching heathens by picking up their toys first so that they then become temporarily engrossed in the absolute joy of creating new chaos and havoc just long enough to sanitize the bathrooms. Yay!  No one gets Oregon Trail sick! (you know... dysentery or bitten by a rattle snake.  Which is TOATALLY POSSIBLE in that bathroom)   Brave Hubby then feverishly takes care of any yard work that involves using sharpened metal implements (Sass Monkey LOVES them shiny and sharp!) and I am usually able to clean and dry all the floors fast enough that Sprinkles doesn’t have Pine Sol breath (which isn't as bad as, say, potting soil breath but the State REALLY frowns upon babies burping fake pine).  All in all, we are usually done, and done in, around 11 a.m…. just in time for quiche.  Hahahahahahahahaaaaa!

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